Well. There's really no other way to put this:
WGIAC has a broken tibia inflicted by the fantastically crappy elevator in his fantastically crappy Section 8 apartment building, has one leg in a cast, and we are not going to New Haven. When he told me about the leg on Monday, he indicated that leg was doing fine with his regular routine and that he was still enthusiastic about making the trip. Yesterday though, when I called him from DC, he had changed his mind, citing a bunch of reasons that make little sense to me, and that really had nothing to do with the broken leg. I've been using the leg as the primary excuse to make me less pissed off about the bail-out. I asked if he was absolutely positive about saying "no" to a week of free transportation, free hotel, and free caregiver, but he had convinced himself already to stay here in DC for the time being.
It's not crystal clear to me why he now doesn't want to go, when he's talked of going to New Haven for over a year. I do know that around 20 people have shelled out good money to get him up there, and now I get to tell them that he's decided to not make the trip. I see a couple of options for you guys, and if any of you have more ideas, I'm certainly open to hear them. The first idea is that I transfer/mail/paypal you your donation back. The second idea is that I put the money into a trust-type fund for WGIAC for if and when he is able to travel up to New Haven, not to be used for anything but associated travel or lodging costs. This second idea was actually WGIAC's idea; he wants to make sure that any donated money is safeguarded and used only for the reason it was given in the first place.
If you "want your money back," I don't blame you one bit. I want my metaphorical money back, including several hours of effort spent by me, my family, and you guys over the past week. Just send me a fb message or email indicating if you want a refund, or if you want to trust fund, and I'll make it happen either way.
Sorry for the bummer news, and I remain grateful-for-life to you for pitching in. WGIAC was awed that you guys had whipped together that kind of money in so few days. When I meet up with him for coffee in the next week, I'll try and get to the bottom of his current situation, which seems to get more and more complicated every time I talk to him. It's no mystery to me what causes burnout among nurses and home health caregivers. Take care of yourselves out there.